Parental Alienation Syndrome (PAS)
| Abused Swan |
“Studies show batterers are able to convince authorities that the victim is unfit or undeserving of sole
custody in approximately 70% of challenged cases.” (American Judges Association) (Custody
Preparations for Moms Organization, 2006) “Fathers who batter mothers are two times more likely to
seek sole physical custody of their children than are nonviolent fathers.” (APA 1996, P, 40) (Custody
Preparations for Moms Organization, 2006)
This alienation arises in the child-custody dispute in the court system. These fathers get the children
to view the mother as someone who does not love them as much as the father does. The children
become extremely misbehaved and do not listen to the mother. Judges are blaming the mothers
for their children’s behavior and stating, “It is the mother’s type of parenting style that is causing her
children to be angry.” Judge Patricia Gardner.
On top of getting the children to misbehave for the mother, the father will keep the mother in a
court battle and try several tactics to get her to lose her job. Deanna had a personal protection
order against her former spouse. He continued to call her place of employment and even called
her boss trying to get her fired. These fathers are out to destroy every aspect of the mother’s life and
they are doing it with the help of our legal system.
The emotional abuse by the father is from the programming of the child that destroys the child’s
bond with a good and loving parent. Emotional abuse can be the level of care shown to a child
made contingent on the child’s behavior or actions to give information in regards to the good
parent. The abuser is emotionally unavailable to the child if the child does not participate in the
campaign of destruction and will become unresponsive, inconsistent, or have inappropriate
expectations of the child. These children becomes anxious because they are burdened with
premature responsibly that causes confusion, tension, and frustration. The child is expected to
behave and control themselves in a certain way, even if they do not understand why. This
becomes more confusing to the child because the mother is teaching the child opposite behavior
patterns such as being honest, caring, and helping others.
custody in approximately 70% of challenged cases.” (American Judges Association) (Custody
Preparations for Moms Organization, 2006) “Fathers who batter mothers are two times more likely to
seek sole physical custody of their children than are nonviolent fathers.” (APA 1996, P, 40) (Custody
Preparations for Moms Organization, 2006)
This alienation arises in the child-custody dispute in the court system. These fathers get the children
to view the mother as someone who does not love them as much as the father does. The children
become extremely misbehaved and do not listen to the mother. Judges are blaming the mothers
for their children’s behavior and stating, “It is the mother’s type of parenting style that is causing her
children to be angry.” Judge Patricia Gardner.
On top of getting the children to misbehave for the mother, the father will keep the mother in a
court battle and try several tactics to get her to lose her job. Deanna had a personal protection
order against her former spouse. He continued to call her place of employment and even called
her boss trying to get her fired. These fathers are out to destroy every aspect of the mother’s life and
they are doing it with the help of our legal system.
The emotional abuse by the father is from the programming of the child that destroys the child’s
bond with a good and loving parent. Emotional abuse can be the level of care shown to a child
made contingent on the child’s behavior or actions to give information in regards to the good
parent. The abuser is emotionally unavailable to the child if the child does not participate in the
campaign of destruction and will become unresponsive, inconsistent, or have inappropriate
expectations of the child. These children becomes anxious because they are burdened with
premature responsibly that causes confusion, tension, and frustration. The child is expected to
behave and control themselves in a certain way, even if they do not understand why. This
becomes more confusing to the child because the mother is teaching the child opposite behavior
patterns such as being honest, caring, and helping others.
For fathers to get custody of their children, they are alienating their children against their mother.
This has been termed by psychologist as Parental Alienation Syndrome (PAS).
Out of all divorces, 80% are uncontested custody cases, and the mothers are the primary care giver
to the children.
Those 20% that are contested cases, the abusive father will gain custody 72% of the time.
Parental Alienation Syndrome Sheet
This has been termed by psychologist as Parental Alienation Syndrome (PAS).
Out of all divorces, 80% are uncontested custody cases, and the mothers are the primary care giver
to the children.
Those 20% that are contested cases, the abusive father will gain custody 72% of the time.
Parental Alienation Syndrome Sheet
Maternal Alienation
Maternal alienation occurs in a context of violence against women and children, whereby perpetrators of
abuse deliberately try to destroy the relationship between children and their mother (Morris 1999).
Research shows that maternal alienation is used as a strategy of abuse across a continuum of violence
and abuse, which includes child sexual abuse, and domestic enforce secrecy, maintain power and control,
injure and punish.
Research into the tactics used by child sex offenders to entrap their victims and enforce secrecy show
that their strongest target is to break the mother-child relationship (Hooper 1992; Laing 1999). In the area
of domestic violence recent reports draw attention to the manipulation and undermining of the mother-
child relationship by men who use violence and abuse (Irwin 2002; Mullender 2002).
The 1999 research project on maternal alienation identified that within both domestic violence and child
sexual abuse similar strategies are used to undermine the mother child relationship. These strategies
both disparage the mother as a figure to be despised, and elevate the father as combination of victim-
hero (Morris 1999).
The strategies used in maternal alienation Messages about mothers
• “Your mother doesn’t love you";
• “Your mother is crazy";
• “Your mother is lazy";
• “Your mother is loathsome";
• “Your mother is a bad mother";
• “Your mother is to blame for everything".
Messages about themselves – alienator as victim/hero
• “I’m poor – your mother took everything from me”;
• (with daughters) “Poor me – I need you to look after me";
• (with sons) “As men we’re special, and the more you join me in laughing
at and degrading the females in the family, the more you become a
real man like me”.
Actions to alienate
• ‘Buy’ children;
• Stop mothers having contact;
• Threaten or punish children who don’t comply with his regime;
• Hold out ‘carrots’ – children constantly have to perform to get his
notice, affection or approval;
• Tell children to defy their mothers (coach them in degrading and
abusive acts towards women);
• Involve community, neighbors, and her family in her degradation.
Overview of the strategies
• The strategies are used in powerful combinations, in matrices which
lock the meanings of the acts and messages together, which makes it
difficult for those at whom these strategies are directed to unravel
where they have come from.
• The messages are contradictory and tyrannical. They use rhetorical
devices to provoke an extreme emotional response.
• The process of maternal alienation is relentless and ongoing, often for
decades.
• They shape children's views of their mother, their abuse and the
environment they live in, in powerful ways.
• They contradict children's own experiences, and therefore can block
their own healing.
• Children are generally not aware that these messages are lies or
distortions of events.
• The messages serve to conceal or excuse the abuse that these men
perpetrate.
• In blaming mothers, alienators direct children's anger towards their
mothers, and community anger towards the women in these families,
who are themselves victims of violence.
Maternal alienation occurs in a context of violence against women and children, whereby perpetrators of
abuse deliberately try to destroy the relationship between children and their mother (Morris 1999).
Research shows that maternal alienation is used as a strategy of abuse across a continuum of violence
and abuse, which includes child sexual abuse, and domestic enforce secrecy, maintain power and control,
injure and punish.
Research into the tactics used by child sex offenders to entrap their victims and enforce secrecy show
that their strongest target is to break the mother-child relationship (Hooper 1992; Laing 1999). In the area
of domestic violence recent reports draw attention to the manipulation and undermining of the mother-
child relationship by men who use violence and abuse (Irwin 2002; Mullender 2002).
The 1999 research project on maternal alienation identified that within both domestic violence and child
sexual abuse similar strategies are used to undermine the mother child relationship. These strategies
both disparage the mother as a figure to be despised, and elevate the father as combination of victim-
hero (Morris 1999).
The strategies used in maternal alienation Messages about mothers
• “Your mother doesn’t love you";
• “Your mother is crazy";
• “Your mother is lazy";
• “Your mother is loathsome";
• “Your mother is a bad mother";
• “Your mother is to blame for everything".
Messages about themselves – alienator as victim/hero
• “I’m poor – your mother took everything from me”;
• (with daughters) “Poor me – I need you to look after me";
• (with sons) “As men we’re special, and the more you join me in laughing
at and degrading the females in the family, the more you become a
real man like me”.
Actions to alienate
• ‘Buy’ children;
• Stop mothers having contact;
• Threaten or punish children who don’t comply with his regime;
• Hold out ‘carrots’ – children constantly have to perform to get his
notice, affection or approval;
• Tell children to defy their mothers (coach them in degrading and
abusive acts towards women);
• Involve community, neighbors, and her family in her degradation.
Overview of the strategies
• The strategies are used in powerful combinations, in matrices which
lock the meanings of the acts and messages together, which makes it
difficult for those at whom these strategies are directed to unravel
where they have come from.
• The messages are contradictory and tyrannical. They use rhetorical
devices to provoke an extreme emotional response.
• The process of maternal alienation is relentless and ongoing, often for
decades.
• They shape children's views of their mother, their abuse and the
environment they live in, in powerful ways.
• They contradict children's own experiences, and therefore can block
their own healing.
• Children are generally not aware that these messages are lies or
distortions of events.
• The messages serve to conceal or excuse the abuse that these men
perpetrate.
• In blaming mothers, alienators direct children's anger towards their
mothers, and community anger towards the women in these families,
who are themselves victims of violence.
| 1-800-706-4951 |